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because misery loves company....

..and if you're so clever, then why do you sleep alone tonight?

Name:
The Bitter Singles Club
Membership:
Moderated
Posting Access:
All Members
"Only stupid people have good relationships." (Enid Coleslaw)

This is a club for confirmed bachelors and bachelorettes who are utterly incapable of sustaining normal functional relationships but aren't bloody happy about it.
For quirkyalones in denial.
For loose halves of symbiotic relationships.
For angry rage-filled alcoholics.
It is specifically NOT a dating agency so if you're looking hook up begone. You will find only martini-soaked spleen within this club. If you're looking for whiny emo kids who will write songs about comparing your love to a toaster and engrave your name on their glasses, we suggest you try Make Out Club.

In it we discuss reasons why the outside world and everyone happy sucks monkeys for money, and anything else we feel like.

Dear old Moz was right, it does take guts to be gentle and kind, and let's face it that's for wusses anyway, so instead let's all sit around and bitch about people who have better things to do than bemoan the dulling of their senses and the atrophying of their soul.

Not maladjusted, resentful, psychopathic, alienated or single enough to join?

Worry not! You can have a special Spectator card and laugh at the Bernardesque losers contained herein from the smug superiority of the sidelines. You don't get posting rights but you do get to watch and comment on our outpourings.

If any members do accidentally acquire a fondness for one another they will be demoted to Spectators until their misanthropy and dysfunctionalness inevitably causes them to split and they return to their usual habits of unfulfilled alcoholic misery.

Just fill in the form by way of introduction, and put another Smiths record on the turntable, you loner.

Name:
Nature of your loneliness:
Bitterness count(1-5, with 1 being mildly teed off by life and 5 being barely-concealed homicidal frothing rage):
Special powers:
Weapon of choice:
3 favourite drinks (I know it's hard to narrow it down..):
Intended method of self destruction:


Submit your form here to gain admittance to the inner sanctum of self pity and announce your intention to die alone and unmourned.

A photo of yourself looking misanthropic, unlovable, angry or just plain confused and bewildered by the abject cruelty of this world would be good also, but this is not a rating community, we are not here to enjoy ourselves, and no-one cares what you look like. Don't bother trying to look attractive in the photo, that would really be missing the point.

Saturated in alcoholic scorn and self loathing by theresnorain and burnyourbones.

Disclaimer: This is for fun. The bitching contained herein is intended to be of the enjoyable and hyperbolic variety. Please do not take offence from our rejection of a world that shuns us.
abandonment issues, alienation, ambivalence, anger, angst, antipathy, apathy, attention seeking, barely contained rage, being a social leper, being alone, being aloof, being cheap, being ignored, being lonely, being past caring, being shunned, betrayl, black books, blackmailing your emotions, blunted feelings, boredom, break ups, celebacy, cheap bars, cheap sex, cocktail bars, complaining, compulsive masturbation, confusion, cynicism, dead letter boxes, death-in-life, dinner for one, discouraging advances, disillusionment, drinking, drinking alone, drinking before midday, drinking too much, driving at night, drowning my sorrows, drowning your beliefs, drunkeness, dying alone, emotional abuse, empty pubs, enjoying complaining, ennui, exocising memories, explosive supressed rage, failing to pull, false sincerity, fascination, fearless last stands, final stands, flirting, fogetting, gin, giving in, giving up, glass coffins, habitual solitude, hating couples, haunted attics, having low expectations, having prohibitively high standards, heartbreak, hearts for sale/rent, hoplessness, ignoring other people, impotent fury, inadequacy, inhibitions, invisibility, irony, isolation, lack of human contact, last ditch attempts, living a double life, living alone, living in your memories, longing, lonliness, love/hate relationships, loveless unions, lovesickness, making mistakes, making your own entertainment, martinis, meaningless flings, metaphoricity, misanthropy, moping, morbid fears, not caring, not even trying, not wanting to feel, one night stands, pacing the floor, passive-aggressiveness, personal ads, radiohead, rage, ranting, reading in bed, refusing to settle, regretful encounters, rejection, repression, restlessness, sad films, searching for something missing, seclusion, self denial, self deprication, self disgust, self loathing, self mockery, self negating conflicting emotions, self obsession, self pity, self sufficiency, sexual frustration, sham marriages, shame, singing sad songs loudly, singledom, sleeping all day, sleeping alone, sleeping pills, sleeping with ghosts, social ineptness, solitaire, solitary pursuits, solitude, sulking, the "live-fast-die-young" pension scheme, the smiths, thinking too much, this vale of tears, unfulfilling casual sex, unrequited love, venting spleen, walled up inside yourself, wasting your life, weary lust, whiling away the time, white wine, worshiping from afar

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